Addressed the stein on the table. That poor stein has been waiting for me for at least a week. Today it is so dreary outside. I wasn't sure I would be able to pull the shot off. And, I may try again tomorrow, but not going to promise such a thing to you, or to myself.
This week I came face to face with jealousy, greed and feelings of entitlement. Evil and ugly--the ugliest, most self-centered (selfish) qualities I have ever encountered--mind boggling and horrifying. [include reference to mirrors]
Dealing with death, in any form, opens one's heart to see clearly. It seems that death is the great leveler and when grieving, we are vulnerable enough to receive important life lessons. We see things we need to change.
Recently I have been asking to be shown how to "let go" of things and people. Things because they are a heavy responsibility to carry around and people because often they bring not only negativity, but unnecessary drama and craziness into our lives, or we love them so much, we selfishly want to hold on tight. It isn't easy walking away.
Last night I had an "ah-ha moment" realizing that by selling (or giving away) things, life will be simpler and lighter. And, by saying, "I love you. Call me when you get your head screwed on straight," will free me from the weight of feeling responsible for anyone who is not being truthful with themselves. People make choices and get themselves into messes. It is up to them to take responsibility for creating the messes they are in. It is up to them to change their thinking and as a result, change their lives.
To those who feel entitled: No one owes you anything...noone owes you a living...and as long as you think you are entitled, folks will run from you. Life, in my opinion, is about giving not taking. And greed: Greed strangles love and cuts off the life force. Greed is harsh. Greed is the negative side of taking care of yourself (and others) in a kind, nurturing, gentle way.
Life is fragile and beautiful. Everywhere we can see beauty and be thankful. We can even be thankful for what appears to be "bad." During those apparently "bad" times, we learn much. (Insert story re: good and bad--the story about the farmer, his son and horse.)
Here's to living in the now. Here's to giving. Here's to surrendering and letting go. Here's to enjoying each day moment by moment. Here's to sending love to one's friends and enemies.
Afterthought: And, if all fails, and I doubt it will because love is the most powerful force around, .... crush 'em like a bug! LOL! [End with humor.]
Draft--Revised 12/4/2011, 12/5/2011 Notes to Self: Include Insights Into Letting Go of Dying Loved Ones
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